Angry Joe Writes a Letter He'll Never Send
I tend not to show my anger. It’s a blessing and a curse. When I do blow my top, it’s usually at something in the publishing industry, ensuring that the only people who ever witness it are my poor wife or fellow writers. This has earned me the nickname Angry Joe in some circles. Angry Joe reared his ugly head earlier this week when something in the local community set me off, and I felt compelled to write an email that I’ll never send. As I explain in my SleuthSayers article this week, this is in a grand tradition that includes such writers as Abraham Lincoln and Ben Franklin.
Go check out the article, which is called:
And here is part of what I’m saying:
1. Writer A brings three books. Writer B brings 50. These “offerings,” if I may so describe them, would be lopsided.
2. Just because an author wrote a book does not mean that someone they are schmoozing with wants to take home a copy of that person’s book.
3. Unwanted gifts suck.
4. Not everyone is a reader.
5. Even if a person *is* a heavy reader, their tastes are bound to differ from the next guy. Offering a book to someone who has no intention of reading it falls into creepy, unwanted gift territory. It also makes writers look desperate.
6. Writers may indeed have their books lying around their homes. But chances are they paid something for them.
By the time I reached this point, I was angry. (Yes, folks—it happens.) Naturally, I sat down to write an email. Boy, was it satisfying. Spleen thus vented, I knew immediately that I would never send that letter.
Because I’m chicken? No—because I am like Abraham Lincoln.
Yes, I know: it’s all rather cryptic, isn’t it?
What am I angry about? Why didn’t I send the letter? What does Lincoln, of all people, have to do with all this?
You shall just have to go read the damn article to find out.
***
Now, about my wife’s book…
Now a National Bestseller.
TWO WAYS TO GET DENISE’S BOOK:
The summer part of her tour is done. She’s back home and resting up nicely. There are numerous fall (and winter) dates on the calendar, but for a few weeks she’ll be relaxing.
Unless Denise is coming to a bookstore near you, the best way to get a signed copy of her new book is to order from Malaprop’s, the indie bookstore in our hometown of Asheville, North Carolina. They are a great small business, and they have been delivering Denise’s books to happy customers for something like 15 years without a hitch. So you can’t go wrong. If you think you would like the book inscribed a certain way to a friend or family member, I recommend phoning the store to make sure they have all those details down correctly.
HAVE YOU SEEN THE NEW OBSTINATE DAUGHTERS T-SHIRTS?
Yes, we went there! We’re selling cool new “Obstinate” shirts at our new Joe & Denise store. A ton of different designs, and a sprightly array of colors. I’ll talk about the store some other time, but suffice to say, you won’t want to miss what we’ve got going on over there. As it turns out, the shirt I’ve been sharing on these blogs all these weeks has turned out to be the most popular one we sell…
Click the shirt to learn more!
Dean Wesley Smith is an incredibly prolific writer. He writes with his cats. I write with my pooch. Dean is adept at writing into the dark at speed. In other words, he does not outline his work before writing and sets for himself some remarkable word—count challenges. In a book of his I recently read, Writing With the Waltese Falcon, he shows us how he wrote three books—one in ten days, one in seven, and one in five while traveling on vacation. That’s incredible. In a column I share on SleuthSayers, the mystery blog, this week, I do a quick overview of the book and then share the story of my one and only experiment writing at speed. I’ve shared that story on this blog a few years ago.
I’ve been on the road with my wife Denise Kiernan as she visits bookstores and promotes her new book, Obstinate Daughters, about the women behind the American Revolution. The experience of being on the road together to sell copies of a RevWar book brought back a ton of memories—going as far back as childhood. “I have been here before, and before, and before,” is all I keep thinking. Why? In 1976…
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I attended a college graduation recently and got strangely emotional before the ceremony began. I started analyzing why, and I finally landed on the fact that I love learning, and haven’t stopped doing so, really, since I was a kid. I took out a notebook, started jotting down some thoughts, and before long I had the makings of an article on the topic that dips into nostalgia, yes, but also touches on a prophecy made by one of my professors way back in…
I have too many books, and I’ve grown to accept that I always will. When I first started reading, I always finished books that I bought or borrowed before buying another one. This used to be an unspoken rule of mine. It just felt like the smart thing to do. But somehow I took a wrong turn. It happened after college when I was living on my own. Slowly, I started buying books that I intended to read, brought them home, stuck them on a shelf somewhere, and never…
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The glory days of pulp fiction were the 1920s to 1940s, when newsprint magazines filled with thrilling stories were available by the dozens or even hundreds at dirt-cheap prices. For as little as a nickel or dime readers snapped up copies filled with tons of genre tales. The writers who cranked out copy for these magazines were paid as little as a third of a cent a word to four cents a word. Those days are long gone. In the mystery field, there are far fewer ways to get paid as a writer. Hilariously, though, the top two magazines in the mystery genre today pay a munificent 8 cents a word. When writers talk about the days of the pulps, it’s often with reverence, as if writers back then had great opportunities that have since dried up…
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You can read my article at this link. It is called…
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A third of the U.S. population leaves high school and never reads a book again in their lives.
Forty percent of college grads never crack a book after getting their sheepskin.
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So why on earth would you…
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The words of wisdom come from people such as…
I’ve written another article about dogs, this time about how dogs are used in various ways the world over to help humans. They are, as I point out, probably the second most employed species on the planet. This article builds on the premise I laid a few weeks ago at SleuthSayers, the mystery blog, when I shared some fun facts about dog noses. If you love dogs, you will want to check this story out.
The post is called…
I’m over at SleuthSayers, the mystery blog, today, talking how dogs and humans came to be pals, and other amazing facts about canine noses. I don’t think you’ll want to miss it if you are a dog lover.
The post is called…
Next year is the 250th anniversary of the United States, which means it is necessarily also the 250th birthday of the Declaration of Independence. I know a lot about that document, thanks to the research I did several years ago to write a book about the signers of that hallowed document. Today, I’m talking about a lesser-known individual associated with the Declaration—Timothy Matlack—the man who actually hand-wrote the document that all the Congressmen signed…
For a guy who is not a designer, I sure am obsessed with fonts. I have been since the late eighties, when a designer I worked with at Scholastic enjoyed pointing out how much choosing the right typeface could immediately alter or enhance an article I was preparing for publication.
I go font shopping from time to time to help me nail the look of a particular project Denise and I are working on on the side.
My go-to websites are myfonts and Fontspring, but I have been known to buy direct, which is how I came across the work of Brian Wilson, a typeface designer and novelist who is renowned…
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I’m planning a future article for writers on this very topic, and realized that it would be hand to make the questionnaire available.
Here’s how to get it…
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My latest post for SleuthSayers, the mystery writers blog, shows what happens when stuff annoys me…
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The book I’m talking about is called From the Mix-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler, by E.L. Konigsburg. And if you haven’t read it, how can you call yourself a grown-up child?
January is revered by Sherlock Holmes geeks each year because the biggest Sherlock Holmes geek ever—the late William S. Baring-Gould—decreed that Sherlock’s presumed birthday is January 6th. The best-known mystery magazine, Ellery Queen’s Mystery Magazine, actually pubs a Sherlock Holmes issue each year at this time. And at the top of the year, I too try to do some sort of Sherlockian post at SleuthSayers, the mystery writers blog that I write for…
I tend not to show my anger. It’s a blessing and a curse. When I do blow my top, it’s usually at something in the publishing industry, ensuring that the only people who ever witness it are my poor wife or fellow writers. This has earned me the nickname Angry Joe in some circles. Angry Joe reared his ugly head earlier this week when something in the local community set me off, and I felt compelled to write an email that I’ll never send. As I explain in my SleuthSayers article this week, this is in a grand tradition that includes such writers as Abraham Lincoln and Ben Franklin…